Monday 28 March 2011

The Case Of The Missing Ouseph (Part_B).

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Dearest Pitkin,

No apology necessary - though, as I have learned through bitter experience, you must try to ensure that "dinner" does not become anything other than a singular juncture in your working(?) day. Having said that, I admit I also find these seasonal transitions rather onerous (you'll remember, March has never been my favourite month) and, what with the impending tribunal, I've been feeling quite out of sorts this last week. On top of this, I have discovered that my so-called "miracle" blood pressure prescription I told you about also comes equipped with a host of minor, though still undesirable, side-effects, including bloating, wheezing, hot-flushes, flatulence and nausea. When I challenged Lionel to explain why he hadn't informed me of this earlier, he said he didn't think I'd notice the difference. Either way, he assures me that those dry patches on my elbows are not related.

It's really too much for Maurice to have adopted the part of a jilted-Jemima. As you know, I wrote several letters to him at the time explaining my position and that, as far as I was concerned, the matter should now be put-to-bed (no pun intended). No doubt, he also neglected to tell you about the "back-fees" he attempted to extract from me during our last encounter at dear Alistair Cockswain's cremation. Indeed, M's behaviour (and appearance) that day was so incongruous, not to mention unfitting to the occasion that I had wondered if he might have had another relapse. I don't think he's really been himself since the raid, and the less said about that guttersnipe Choi the better. 

I have to say, I'm rather taken aback by the continuing brouhaha at BAFBA, though I'm sorry if you feel put upon in my absence. Surely it's only the board that need get a whiff of the real story (most of them probably have already), and the minnows can just be placated with a few raids on the hospitality kitty.

Finally, re: the new member. Caution, Pitkin, I advise caution. It sounds to me like he ticks a lot of the right boxes for our purposes (perhaps too many?), but we don't want another "Timmy Kranky" on our consciences. Enough said, I think.

As ever, 

Joseph.


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